Living out a dream… February 2, 2012
Posted by erichaynes in Adventures in Storytelling, General, Spiritual Journey, Stories of MyLife.Tags: God, Journey, purpose, Spiritual Journey, Stories of MyLife, Storytelling
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Once upon a time, there was a balding, middle-aged man who was trying to decide how he was going to act out his mid-life crisis…would he get a hot car, a hot babe, or just drink beer all day, every day, until he had a nice big belly to keep him company? After contemplating this for about 2 seconds, he decided NOT to have a mid-life crisis after all.
Instead, he decided to join the staff of a less-than-conventional-organization (sometimes referred to as Shoal Creek Community Church) and direct efforts in serving children and families in the Northland of Kansas City. For the past year, he (that is, I) has been having a blast strategizing, planning and implementing exciting new experiences for families and children to encounter God in their daily lives. This adventure continues with some amazing plans and activities in the coming year.
But another dream has been brewing inside of him (me) that took a big step forward this past month — the dream to become a Storyteller. Why? Well, for several reasons, the least of which is because it is simply amazingly fun to tell stories to kids and adults, whether they are fables, riddles, tall tales, or bible stories. But more importantly, our lives are woven in Story, whether it is the stories with which we entertain ourselves, or with which we frighten ourselves, or the stories that give us Hope. Our very lives are stories in the making and, each of us, in our unique way, are storytellers. And most importantly, we are woven into the Greater Story of our Creator, who is constantly writing His Story of Redemption and Glory through our lives.
I want to live and learn the art of story, and share those stories to this generation and the next. And I want to reach those families who never walk inside a church, or look beyond the television sets, or have simply lost hope that there can be any value in the story being woven within them. And so today I launched Dragonfly Musings, a new website where stories can be discovered, where a storyteller can be commissioned, and where God’s Story can extend beyond the walls of a church building. I hope you’ll drop by and share some stories of your own.
(And if you want to know why “dragonfly”, then click HERE.)
Starting a new Christmas Tradition: Found Gifts December 10, 2011
Posted by erichaynes in Dads, Family Ministry, Family Stories, General, Random Reflections, Readings, and Resources.Tags: Christmas, dad, gifts, traditions
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My friend Richard has a great post about his experience with Found Gifts. I wanted to share his post and a story of my own.
A “found gift” is a gift that has special meaning about or for the recipient. In this age of big ticket items and buying gift cards (not to mention cash), we have lost the fine art of giving gifts that really mean something.
Over Thanksgiving, our family draws names out of a hat for the person that we will give the “found gift” to at Christmas. The rules are simple. Keep the name a secret. Do not just go out and buy a gift (spending no money is preferable, but sometime necessary). The gift has to either be something that is “found” around the house or made. And an optional “rule” that we use is that the giver must include a written description of the gift and why they are giving it, and they are expected to read the letter out loud (scary, huh?)
This little tradition has transformed our family Christmas celebrations. Sure, we still give the standard gifts: toys, clothes, and do-dads. But on Christmas Eve, after we all get into our new pajamas, we share our found gifts with each other as a way to symbolize our relationship with Christ and with each other
.
Last year, my wife drew my name. The gift she gave me was a small key that had been kept in her van glove box. The key was of little importance, but kept there because of the roof rack I installed on that that has a locking mechanism. The key doesn’t even unlock the racks. It is the “core” key — it is a blank key that is used to install (or uninstall) the core of the locking mechanism. When I explained that though the key doesn’t actually unlock the system, it does get to the very core of the system, my wife knew she had found her gift.
On Christmas morning, I opened my gift…that simple little key. Lynne went on to explain that she said my explanation of the key’s purpose was similar to my role in her life and the life of our family…that my leadership gets to the very core of who we are as a familly. She went on to talk about how important I was as a husband and a father. As a guy that often feels like he is failing as a husband or father (what dad/husband doesn’t?), these words of encouragement and appreciation were deeply touching.
Today, I still carry this gift around on my key chain as a constant reminder that I am important and valued as the leader of my family. When all other gifts I received at Christmas were forgotten the next week, this gift stays with me, and continues to transform my relationship with my wife and kids.
I encourage you to consider starting a new tradition in your family this year…I guarantee that it will make a huge difference! Let me know how it went.
Merry Christmas!
2 Weeks of Summer Left August 1, 2011
Posted by erichaynes in Exploring God's World Together, Family Stories, General, Just for Fun, Sites worth visiting, Stories of MyLife.Tags: art, Family Ministry, Fun, Stories of MyLife, Summer, theater
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There’s just over 2 weeks of summer left for the family before the kids (and my wife) start another school year. There are still a few things we hope to do before The End is upon us. Maybe these ideas will inspire you and your family to seize the final days of summer and throttle them for all their worth:
- Beat the heat by visiting an art museum. Here in Kansas City, the Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art is finishing up a special exhibition of a Monet 3-piece work that I want to take the kids to see. Just thinking of the cooling colors of a Monet pond scene helps me endure this heat wave better!
- Build something with the kids. Picked up this book from the library and can’t wait to launch an H2O rocket!
- Get out of town for the day. We’re heading to this quaint little town which is only a couple of hours out of KC to explore, have some ice cream, and take in a little mystery at the theatre.
- Hit the Farmer’s Market or pick-your-own produce farm. We’ve really enjoyed expanding our repertoire of fresh foods this summer. We’ll probably go here and here at least once more before school hits.
- Get wet. Time to hit the pool, turn on the sprinklers, or maybe cut into a juicy, ripe watermelon.
Post-Vacation Reflections June 13, 2011
Posted by erichaynes in Exploring God's World Together, Family Stories, General, Just for Fun, Stories of MyLife.Tags: Exploring God's World Together, God, nature, people, simplicity, Spiritual Journey, Stories of MyLife, Vacations, Wilderness
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Got back this week from a 2-week family vacation to Kentucky. We WERE going to go to Tennessee, but THIS abruptly changed our plans at the last minute, so we were scrambling for an alternative. Just as well — I’d never explored Kentucky before either and we had an amazing trip. Here’s some highlights and reflections on what I took away from the trip:
- There are two types of camping people in the world: those who go and USE nature, and those of us who want to be IN nature. When you camp at a park focused on a lake, you tend to get the former and they are typically loud, drunk, and messy. When you camp at a park without a lake, the campers tend to be quieter, more focused on hiking, biking, and relaxing, and they tend to take better care of the park. We stayed HERE, which was beautiful, but the weekend crowd was definitely a lake-crowd. I started to dislike Kentuckians.
- We walked the trail that Daniel Boone blazed across the Cumberland Gap. There is something in me that yearns to discover new lands and pave the way for others to follow.
- Colonel Sanders was an amazing man. Believe it or not, THIS is worth a stop and having lunch.
- Surprised by this venture on a train to an old, deserted mining community. People lived harder lives back then, that is for sure, but still, there is something about the simplicity of it all that is appealing.
- If you ever go here, skip the side of the river where the gift store is and head across the bridge and walk the Eagle Falls trail — much better views of Cumberland Falls thrown in.
- Red River Gorge is beautiful and is second only to Utah for the number of natural arches (Gray’s Arch is a must-see). We hiked several trails and caught up on laundry. Our campsite was quiet, peaceful, and a lot less mosquitoes. Camping is ALWAYS better with less mosquitoes.
- Visited the site of the Battle of Richmond, including this visitor center. An amazing guide showed us around. I’m still confused at why Native-Americans would join the Civil War…I’d love to know their motivation and how they decided which side to join. It is fascinating to engage my son about the Civil War and see the conclusions and opinions he forms. He has some very profound thoughts.
- I was blown away by Kentucky Horse Park in Lexington. Amazing grounds, beautiful horses, and a well-done museum about the history of horses and how they influenced history. Well worth the expensive admittance price, especially when you have a 10-year-old daughter who adores horses.
- Sitting at a campsite in the early dawn hours and listening for God’s voice is the epitome of living, in my opinion. Though, I did get concerned one morning that the large gathering of crows was planning on attacking our campsite.
- Mammoth Cave National Park was truly mammoth. The campground was not ideal, but the cave is HUGE! We took two different tours, including one by lamplight. I’m just glad I made it through Fat Man’s Misery– I wouldn’t have lived it down if I had gotten stuck!
- 9 nights without a single rain-storm! That is a Haynes family camping record. Didn’t get the tent wet even once.
- I love getting to watch my kids on trips like this, especially when they serve each other. Tim used some of his souvenir money to buy his little sister an extra souvenir, Elizabeth jumps right in and helps with setting up the tent, and Anna loves getting the cots and sleeping bags arranged. We can tear down and re-load a campsite in under an hour (it used to take us 3 hours). Anna built her first campfire by herself…she was very proud.
- I discovered that I am more stressed when I don’t have a clear plan for the day. Because of our last minute destination change, we weren’t as planned out as I like. It was hard to relax on some days.
- I also have to learn to trust God and those back home that ministry can and will go on without me. I was anxious about how things would go in Kidzone and my dads group, but all went well. Sometimes my arrogance can get the best of me and tricks me into thinking that I am way more important than I really am.
- Oh, and I did meet some Kentuckians that were pleasant and not drunk. I quit disliking them, though they sure do talk strange.
- My wife and kids still dislike bluegrass music. I’ll have to continue listening in the closet.
- Apparently, based on my daughter’s conclusions, you haven’t really visited a place until you’ve gone through the gift store, twice.
Stop Praying in your Head May 11, 2011
Posted by erichaynes in Family Ministry, General, Leadership, Spiritual Journey, Stories of MyLife.Tags: Christ, Family Ministry, God, Grace, Intimacy, Journey, leaders, Leadership, ministry, people, prayer, Presence of God, small groups, Spiritual Journey, spiritual transformation, Spirituality, Stories of MyLife, Talking with God
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I struggle to pray. 
Yea, I know, I’ve been a Christian a long time…we’re all supposed to be able to “thee” and “thou” with the best of them and give an “AMEN!” at the end of every other sentence. Personally though, I’m still trying to figure out why I’m supposed to close my eyes.
I could probably count on two hands how many times I’ve really felt like I’ve gotten prayer right…and yet, even with those “successes” I’ve still struggled to keep praying in a real and meaningful way. Sometimes I feel like I’m a 7th grader at his first dance and all I can get out of my mouth when I move towards that cute girl on the other side of the room is “bla-bla-gloobla-bloo”.
But this week a couple of big prayer moments happened. First, my wife felt compelled to pray for the kids in our KidZone program at Shoal Creek. She invited others on the team to join her, but they probably suffer from the same “first dance” complex that I often do, and didn’t choose to come. But that didn’t stop Lynne — she walked the hallway, entering each and every room, praying for the kids and for their small group leaders. She prayed very specific prayers, and she asked specific requests of God. She told me afterward, as she prayed over my desk, that she felt God gave her the word “oneness” — that as “one team” our staff of volunteers need to serve these kids and share with them God’s Redemptive Story. Not sure what that looks like yet, but I felt God’s presence in that.
The second event happened today. Spurred on by the example of my wife, and responding to a felt call by the Spirit, I prayed for each and every man in my Tuesday morning men’s group. I had promised them to take up their causes and needs and pray a FULL HOUR for them this week.
What was I thinking??!! A full HOUR?
Now, don’t get me wrong, but I almost hate it when people ask me to pray for them. ”Of course,” I’ll tell them, then either promptly forget it, or I’ll say a quickie prayer under my breath as I get in the car –”God help them” — then go on, knowing I’ve done my civic duty. I’ve checked it off my to-do list.
What I discovered today, as I walked for that whole hour (I prefer to walk while I’m praying, which is a good reason for me to NOT close my eyes), is that when I pray out of my head, I spend little to no time thinking about the person I’m praying about or the God to whom I am praying. Today, however, as I spent the whole hour, I had to slow down (or else run out of things to pray about), and in that slowing down, I started to think about what each man was going through in their life that needed that prayer. And I started to consider how God may go about answering that prayer. And I started reflecting on how that prayer request could have just as easily been a prayer for myself.
As I went through the prayers for these 10 other men, I realized that I was bound to them by the mutual desire to be better men, better husbands, better friends, better fathers, and better Christ-followers. Our hopes and dreams were bound up together, and our joy and suffering was the same. My heart moved toward them, and it softened. And my intimacy with the Lord deepened as we shared a moment of hope, love, and grace towards this humble group of men.
I learned today that Praying is a matter of the heart, not of the head.
Now, the prayer I need from you is that I don’t forget that lesson.
