This one is for my mom (“Hi Mom!) who may be the only person still watching to see if I write anything…it comes from a discussion at my Tuesday morning men’s group.
Journaling this morning, thinking on a friend’s mentioning of the garden in a great book entitled The Shack, the chaos in the garden that is in my messy, beautiful life. Isn’t it interesting that we beg God to fix our lives, make us whole, change the ugliness inside of us, and make everything orderly, like perfect rows of corn. In the book, the Holy Spirit invites the man to work alongside her in the garden, enjoying the process together, even in the hard work, the aching muscles, the stubborn roots, the rocks that have to be moved, the thorns that cut the hands. Out of this chaos comes beauty and a sense of order that isn’t OUR definition of order, but God’s – an order that still looks chaotic, but beautiful because it takes the chaos and the imperfections and reveals a beauty that is inside of that chaos.
When I go and visit someone else’s garden, I can enjoy and appreciate it, but only on a surface level. If I hire a landscaper to come and make me a garden at my home, I will enjoy it daily, but only to a certain level. But when I create my own garden, working it and getting dirty in it, I come to enjoy and appreciate it even more…it has my fingerprints in it, my personality, my blood, sweat and tears. I enjoy it at an even deeper level.
But then, what if I began to garden with a Master Gardener, who teaches me how to garden, to envision what I couldn’t see before, to bring in new plants and new designs, to use the existing dynamics of my garden in new ways…and He doesn’t just sit back barking orders, but sits down with me and digs the dirt with me, shows me and holds my hands in His grasp. What if He explores what I enjoy and helps me create a garden that reflects that…what if I explored what He knew and discovered a whole new world in my garden. This garden – it would go beyond all my expectations and previous understanding of gardening. And as I walk around that garden, I would see the mistakes I made, the corrections of the Master Gardener, the nuances of this unique creation. I would remember the laughter, the painful moments, the sad moments of plants destroyed, and the joy of new plants blooming. I would remember where we battled the moles together and where we dreamed together. The garden of my life would become less about me, and more about my relationship with the Master Gardener…my life would become His Masterpiece, and in it would be woven His love for me. I believe that God wants to be our mentor…my life is greater because He is teaching me and guiding me.
As I read about the Passover and the betrayal of Christ by Judas, it hit me that Jesus gave His body and blood so that my life may bloom. When I try to garden in my own design, my perfectly ordered rows, then I deny His design and His gift, and I miss out on what could be and the intimacy of being at His side as we garden together. And I got to thinking, was He thinking of ME when He submitted to the Cross? I believe with my whole heart that He did think about me specifically – deeply, intimately, and personally.
Do you believe that He thought about YOU? Not just in general, but about you specifically, deeply, intimately, and personally at that moment?